There are some fish that cannot be caught.
It's not that they're faster or stronger than other fish.
They're just touched by something extra.
One such fish was The Beast.
And by the time I was born he was already a legend.
He'd passed up more $100 lures than any fish in Alabama.
Some said that fish was the ghost of a thief...
...who'd drowned in that river 60 years before.
Others claimed he was a dinosaur left over from the "Cruaceous" Period.
I didn't put any stock into such speculation or superstition.
All I knew was I'd been trying to catch that fish...
...since I was a boy no bigger than you.
And on the day you were born...
Well, that was the day I finally caught him.
Now, I'd tried everything on it:
Worms, lures, peanut butter, peanut butter and cheese.
But on that day I had a revelation:
If that fish was the ghost of Henry Walls, then the usual bait wasn't gonna work.
I was gonna have to use something he truly desired.
-Your finger? -Gold.
Now, I tied my ring onto the strongest line they made...
...strong enough to hold up a bridge, they said, if only for a few minutes.
And then I cast upriver.
The Beast jumped up and grabbed it before it even hit the water.
And just as fast, he snapped clean through that line.
Well, you can see my predicament.
My wedding ring, the symbol of fidelity to my wife...
-...soon to be mother of my child... -Make him stop.
...was now lost in the gut of an uncatchable fish.
What did you do?
I followed that fish upriver and downriver.
This fish, The Beast...
...the whole time we were calling it a him, when in fact it was a her.
It was fat with eggs it was gonna lay any day.
Now, I was in a situation.
I could gut that fish and get my wedding ring back...
...but in doing so I'd be killing the smartest catfish in the Ashton River.
Did I want to deprive my son the chance...
...to catch a fish like this of his own?
This ladyfish and I...
-Well, we had the same destiny. -"We were part of the same equation."
Now, you may well ask...
Oh, darling, darling, it's still your night.
...why did it strike so quick on gold when nothing else would attract it?
That was the lesson I learned that day...
...the day my son was born.
Sometimes the only way to catch an uncatchable woman...
...is to offer her a wedding ring.
What, a father's not allowed to talk about his son?
I'm a footnote in that story, Dad...
...the context for your great adventure, which never happened, incidentally.
You were selling novelty products in Wichita when I was born.
Come on, Will. Everyone loves that story!
They don't. I don't love that story. Not anymore. Not after a thousand times!
I know every punch line, Dad. I can tell them as well as you can!
For one night, one night in your entire life...
...the universe did not revolve around Edward Bloom.
-How can you not understand that? -I'm sorry to embarrass you.
You're embarrassing yourself, Dad. You just don't see it.
After that night, I didn't speak to my father again for three years.
William Bloom, United Press International. If I could just...
We communicated indirectly, I guess.
In her letters and Christmas cards, my mother wrote for both of them.
And when I'd call, she'd say Dad was out driving or swimming in the pool.
True to form, we never talked about not talking.
The truth is, I didn't see anything of myself in my father.
And I don't think he saw anything of himself in me.
We were like strangers who knew each other very well.
In telling the story of my father's life...
...it's impossible to separate fact from fiction, the man from the myth.
The best I can do is to tell it the way he told me.
It doesn't always make sense, and most of it never happened.
Give me back my ring!
Thank you!
But that's what kind of story this is.
His birth would set the pace for his unlikely life.
No longer than most men's, but larger.
And as strange as his stories got...
...the endings were always the most surprising of all.
Yes. Yes, he's here.
It's your mother.
And what does Dr. Bennett say?
No, sure, I'll talk to him.
Yeah, I'll wait.
It's bad?
Yeah, it's more than they thought. They're gonna stop chemo.
-You need to go. -Probably tonight.
-I'm going with you. -No, no, no. You shouldn't.
I'm going with you.
Now, which one's it gonna be?
"Monkey in a Barn," or "Dog in the Road"?
The one about the witch.
Your momma says I can't tell you that one anymore.
-You get nightmares. -But I'm not scared.
Well, neither was I, at first.
Now, this took place in the swamp outside of Ashton.
Children weren't allowed in the swamp on account of the snakes, spiders...
...and quicksand that would swallow you up before you could even scream.
There were five of us out there that night:
Me, Ruthie, Wilbur Freely...
...and the Price Brothers, Don and Zacky.
And not one of us knew what was in store.
It's common knowledge that most towns of a certain size have a witch...
...if only to eat misbehaving children...
...and the occasional puppy who wanders into her yard.
Witches use those bones to cast spells and curses...
...and make the land infertile.
-Is it true she got a glass eye? -I heard she got it from gypsies.
-What's a gypsy? -Your momma's a gypsy.
Your momma's a bitch.
You shouldn't swear. There's ladies present.
-Shit. -Damn.
Screw.
Turn off your flashlights. She'll see you!
Yet of all the witches in Alabama...
...there was one who was said to be the most feared.
For she had one glass eye which was said to contain mystical powers.
I heard if you look right at it, you'll see how you're gonna die.
That's bull-S-H-I-T, that is. She's not even a real witch.
If you're so sure, go get that eye.
I heard she keeps it in a box on her night table. Or are you too scared?
I'll go in right now and get that eye.
-Then do it. -Fine, I will.
-Fine, you do it. -Fine, I'm doing it.
Edward, don't!
She'll make soap out of you. That's what she does.
She makes soap out of people.
Ma'am, my name is Edward Bloom...
...and there's some folks like to see your eye.
-You get The Eye? -I brought it.
Let's see it.
Whoa, help!
I saw how I was gonna die. I was old and I fell.
I wasn't old at all.
I was thinking about death and all. About seeing how you're gonna die.
I mean, on one hand, if dying was all you thought about...
...it could kind of screw you up.
But it could kind of help you, couldn't it?
Because, everything else, you'd know you could survive.
I guess I'm saying I'd like to know.
That's how I go.
Hi, Mom.
-Is that Dr. Bennett's car? -Yes. He's up with your father now.
-And how is he? -Well... No, I got it.
He's impossible. He won't eat. Because he doesn't eat, he's weaker.
Because he's weak, he doesn't want to eat.
-How much time does he have left? -You don't talk about that.
Not yet.
Will.
Dr. Bennett. Oh, it's good to see you.
My wife, Josephine.
A pleasure.
-You're seven months. -To the day!
It's a boy.
Try to get him to drink one of these. He won't, but go ahead and try.
Dad?
You want some water?
-You are in for a surprise. -Am I?
Having a kid changes everything.
There's the diapers and the burping and the midnight feeding.
-Did you do any of that? -No.
But I hear it's terrible.
Then you spend years trying to corrupt and mislead this child...
...fill its head with nonsense, and still it turns out perfectly fine.
-You think I'm up for it? -You learned from the best.
Just drink half the can. I'll tell Mom you drank the whole thing.
Everyone wins.
People needn't worry so much. It's not my time yet.
This is not how I go.
-Really? -Truly. I saw it in The Eye.
-The old lady by the swamp? -She was a witch.
No, she was old and probably senile.
I saw my death in that eye, and this isn't how it happens.
So how does it happen?
Surprise ending. Wouldn't want to ruin it for you.
Your mother thought we wouldn't talk again.
Look at us. We're talking fine.
We're storytellers, both of us.
I speak mine out, you write yours down. Same thing.
Dad...
I hope to talk about some things while I'm here.
You mean while I'm here.
I just want to know the true versions of things:
Events. Stories.
You.
Your mother hasn't been keeping up the pool.
-If you wanted to, you could fix it. -Yeah, I will.
-You know where the chemicals are? -I did it when you were gone.
I was never much for being at home, Will. Too confining.
And this here, being stuck in bed...
Dying is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
-I thought you said you weren't dying. -I said this isn't how I go.
The last part is much more unusual.
Trust me on that.
Dr. Bennett said I have to stay at home for a week.
Oh, that's nothing. Once, I had to stay in bed for three years.
-Did you have the chickenpox? -I wish.
Truth is, no one quite knew what was wrong.
Most times a person grows up gradually...
...while I found myself in a hurry.
My muscles and my bones couldn't keep up with my body's ambition.
So I spent the better part of three years confined to my bed...
...with the encyclopedia being my only means of exploration.
I had made it all the way to the G's...
...hoping to find an answer to my "gigantificationism"...
...when I uncovered an article about the common goldfish.
"Kept in a small bowl, the goldfish will remain small.
With more space...
...the fish will grow double, triple, or quadruple its size."
It occurred to me then that perhaps the reason for my growth...
...was that I was intended for larger things.
After all, a giant man can't have an ordinary-sized life.
As soon as my bones had settled in their adult configuration...
...I set upon my plan to make a bigger place for myself in Ashton.
Tigers, go!
Edward Bloom!
Doggy! My doggy! My doggy's trapped!
I was the biggest thing Ashton had ever seen.
Until one day, a stranger arrived.
Calm down. Calm down, everybody. Calm down. That's enough.
-Mr. Mayor, he ate an entire corn field. -He ate my dog.
If you ain't gonna stop him, mayor, we will.
I won't have mob violence in this town.
Now, has someone tried talking to him?
-You can't reason with him. -He's a monster.
I'll do it.
I'll talk to him. See if I can get him to go.
That creature could crush you without trying.
Oh, trust me, he'll have to try.
Hello?
My name is Edward Bloom, and I wanna talk to you!
Go away!
Now, I'm not going anywhere until you show yourself!
I said, go away!
Armed with the foreknowledge of my own death...
...I knew the giant couldn't kill me.
All the same, I preferred to keep my bones unbroken.
Why are you here?
So you can eat me.
The town decided to send a human sacrifice and I volunteered.
My arms are a little stringy, but there's some good eating in my legs.
I mean, I'd be tempted to eat them myself.
So I guess, well...
If you'd just get it over with quick, because I'm not much for pain, really.
Oh, come on! I can't go back! I'm a human sacrifice!
If I go back, they'll think I'm a coward.
I'd rather be dinner than a coward.
Here.
You can start with my hand. It'll be an appetizer.
I don't want to eat you. I don't want to eat anybody.
I just get so hungry. I'm just too big.
Did you ever think that maybe you're not too big...
...but maybe this town is just too small?
I've heard in real cities there are buildings so tall...
...you can't even see the tops of them.
-Really? -Oh, I wouldn't lie to you.
And all-you-can-eat buffets.
-Now, you can eat a lot, can't you? -I can.
So why are you wasting your time in a small town?
You're a big man. You should be in a big city.
You're just trying to get me to leave, aren't you?
-What's your name, giant? -Karl.
Well, mine's Edward. And truthfully...
Well, I do want you to leave, Karl. But I want to leave with you.
I mean, you think this town is too small for you?
Well, it's too small for a man of my ambition.
So, what do you say? Join me?
Okay.
Now, first, we gotta get you ready for the city.
Edward Bloom, first son of Ashton...
...it's with a heavy heart that we see you go.
But take with you this key to the city...
...and know that any time you want to come back...
...all our doors are open to you.
That afternoon as I left Ashton, everyone seemed to have advice.
Find yourself a nice girl, now!
Watch your pride, Edward Bloom!
But there was one person whose counsel I held above all others.
She said that the biggest fish in the river...
...gets that way by never being caught.
-What'd she say? -Beats me.
There were two roads out of Ashton:
A new one which was paved and an older one that wasn't.
People didn't use the old one anymore...
...and it had developed a reputation for being haunted.
Well, since I had no intention of ever returning to Ashton...
...this seemed as good a time as any to find out what lay down that old one.
-You know anyone who's taken it? -That poet, Norther Winslow, did.
He was going to Paris, France.
I guess he liked it. No one ever heard from him again.
I'll tell you what. You go the other way.
I'll cut through here, and I'll meet you on the far side.
You're just trying to run away, aren't you?
Here.
Just to be sure, you can take my pack.
Why, you son of a...
Now, there comes a point when a reasonable man...
...will swallow his pride and admit that he's made a terrible mistake.
The truth is, I was never a reasonable man.
And what I recall of Sunday school was that...
...the more difficult something is, the more rewarding it is in the end.
Friend! Welcome to you!
-What's your name? -Edward Bloom.
-"Bloom" like a flower? -Yes.
Oh, here! Here you are, right here. "Edward Bloom."
We weren't expecting you yet.
-You were expecting me? -Not yet.
-You must've taken a shortcut. -Why, yes, I did. It almost killed me.
Life will do that to you. And truthfully, the long way is easier.
-But it's longer. -Much longer.
And you're here now, and that's what matters.
What is this place?
The town of Spectre. Best-kept secret in Alabama!
Now, it says here you're from Ashton, right?
Last person we had from Ashton was Norther Winslow.
The poet? Whatever happened to him?
He's still here. Let me buy you a drink. I'll tell you all about it.
Hell, I'll have him tell you!
I have to meet somebody, and I'm already running late.
Now, son, I already told you. You're early.
Now, tell me if that isn't the best pie you ever ate.
It truly is.
Well, everything tastes better here. Even the water is sweet.
Never gets too hot, too cold, too humid.
At night, the wind goes through the trees where you'd swear...
...there was a whole symphony out there playing just for you.
Hey! Jenny!
Come back here!
Jenny!
Hey, I need those.
-There is no softer ground than town. -That almost rhymes.
He's our poet laureate. Come on.
I agreed to spend the afternoon, if only to understand...
...the mystery of how a place could feel so strange and yet so familiar.
I've been working on this poem for 12 years.
Really?
There's a lot of expectation. I don't wanna disappoint my fans.
May I?
It's only three lines long.
This is why you should never show a work in progress.
I got him!
There's leeches in there.
-Did you see that woman? -What did she look like?
-Well, she was... -Was she naked?
Yes, she was.
It's not a woman. It's a fish. No one ever catches her.
Fish looks different to different people.
My daddy said it looked like the coon dog he had when he was a kid...
...back from the dead.
Oh, darn.
-How old are you? -Eighteen.
I'm 8. That means when I'm 18, you'll be 28.
-And when I'm 28, you'll only be 38. -You're pretty good at arithmetic.
And when I'm 38, you'll be 48. That's not much difference at all.
Sure is a lot now, though, huh?
Hey, Edward!
Roses are red Violets are blue
I love Spectre...
Excuse me.
Jenny thinks you're quite a catch. We all do.
What?
I said, you're quite a catch.
I have to leave.
Tonight.
Why?
This town is more than any man could ask for.
And if I were to end up here, I would consider myself lucky.
But the truth is, I'm just not ready to end up anywhere.
But no one's ever left.
How are you gonna make it without your shoes?
Well, I suspect it will hurt. A lot.
Now, I'm sorry, but... Well, goodbye.
-You won't find a better place. -I don't expect to.
Promise me you'll come back.
I promise. Someday. When I'm really supposed to.
That night, I reached two conclusions.
The first was that a dangerous path is made much worse by darkness.
The second was that I was hopelessly and irrevocably lost.
These woods would become my graveyard.
As difficult as it was to reach Spectre, I was fated to get there eventually.
After all, no man can avoid reaching the end of his life.
And then I realized this wasn't the end of my life.
This isn't how I die.
Friend.
-What happened to your shoes? -They kind of got ahead of me.
I don't know if you saw it, but Josephine had some photos...
...in the most recent Newsweek.
Really?
That's just wonderful.
I spent a week in Morocco for the story.